July 18th, 2005 @ 12:14 pm -



Well the only real updates right now is that I added some graphics to try and make this place a little nicer to look at... its sad how much html I've forgotten, it took me all this time to get a table/layer thing set up right to look the way I wanted.. I sure hope it doesn't look like crap on your screen, using IE 6.0 with a 1024x768 resolution it looks satisfactory to me, but if its messed up on your screen, please email/msn me and let me know, along with what browser and resolution you're using. I could do it all my self, but I'm stuck on dial up so I'm not gonna download all the different browsers right now to mess with that.

Wow ok sorry for babbling.. to keep you all updated on my medical news... they still haven't done the 3rd biopsy, so we still haven't a clue where my primary cancer is. I hate this waiting game, I just wanna go home and get away from it all.. for all of you nearby who know me well, please please please write me, msn me, email, or even call.. I'm so isolated I really would love to talk to you guys... I dunno if its my imagination, but its like the second I get cancer all of a sudden 75% of my friends just fell off of msn, and are offline all the time... like they don't wanna talk to me... what did I do wrong?

Alright well anyway, that aside... its basically a waiting game here... they pump me full if drugs, so the pain isn't bothering me, and I wait for results to tests that bring more tests and have more vague results... all I can say for sure at this point is just that the radiation treatments were a god send, I can actually stand again, long enough to stretch my legs, walk to the bathroom, or get something from the cabinet even though for the most part I'm still stuck in a wheelchair cause the spinal cord damage (we are praying is only temporarily) has pretty much made my legs weak and unstable, and the cancer in my bones makes my bones brittle.. I actually broke a rib the other day simply taking a shower.. that's insane!! so my days are just filled with taking it easy, taking my drugs, and messing around with the computer. in some ways its nice, almost like a vacation he he, I did always say I would retire by 30, and here I am, never gonna be able to work again... or so the doctor encourages, but hell if I find that enjoyable computer job I've always wanted, terminal cancer or no, I might take it, I'm sure doing nothing all day is gonna quickly catch up to me. which is why I'm begging all my friends out there who live near me, come over and visit (if/when I get home) lets party and enjoy the time we have...

OK I'll shut up now... since I don't have any real medical updates for anyone, I'll just continue working on the pretty graphics and stuff.. oh by the way I gotta thank Justin for hosting this site for me, and Jason for the work he's put in helping me with some scripting issues. you guys are awesome, thanks so much..